I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
