bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
This house was built for laser tag.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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