I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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