how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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