return my video game
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
