soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
