She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
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