I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
