How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize
