Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
