WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
