Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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