Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
im holly from the hills drunk
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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