You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize