She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
