Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
i just had sex bonerless
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Randomize
