dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
