She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize