She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
