good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
