Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
