dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Ketchup is God's man juice
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
