My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
