i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
