Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
