Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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