I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
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