K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
