Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Randomize