Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
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