then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Randomize
