so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
