I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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