do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
