Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
