problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
