The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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