and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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