well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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