i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Randomize
