Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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