Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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