No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
