Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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