areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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