Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
