ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
