yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i may or may not be watching the land before time
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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