i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Randomize
