I wannas sexs uuuuu
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
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